Title: Why Not?
Author: Penelope
Reviewer: SpicyNoodles

Why not? - Penelope



5/5 Title: Excellent choice. You choose a simple title but it has so many different meanings. The title suits your story perfectly as well because Jaejoong keeps questioning their love and why they can't be together.



4/10 Poster and Background: Your back ground is black and the font is white. It may not give a good impression to a reader who's new to your story. When I first saw your layout, I didn't think the story would be more on the cute-comedy side and rather that it was going to be a little dramatic. The colors don't blind your eyes so at least it was easy to read. Try playing with your font and background colors or try getting a poster; I'm sure that'll attract more new readers.



8/10 Forewords: You didn't include much information in your forewords so I'll take your intro' in chapter one as your forewords. I do like your intro' BUT you didn't provide a summary or anything that informs the reader what the story is about. You managed to give little details and make the reader curious over what's going to happen next. If only you included what kind of relationship the main characters have with each other from the start, I personally think the introduction would've been much better.



7/10 Plot: The plot isn't original honestly and it has been used several times. But I'm glad the main two characters don't have a brother-and-sister relationship because I find that idea overused. I admit, in my opinion, I didn't like how you included that Jaejoong was "adopted". It looked like you were trying to find an excuse to make the relationship seem more appropriate.



10/10 Flow: Your chapters could be short sometimes but I really like how you took your time to develop the relationship between the reader and Jaejoong. Your story flow really makes the reader know about how much Jaejoong and the fictional character values each other's love.



10.5/15 Grammar, Spelling, and Vocabulary: I think this is the area you have to most work on. Your vocabulary is good but sometimes you slack off with the grammar and spelling. I've found many spelling and grammar errors in each chapter. I think if you try spending more time on editing and proofreading; your skills will improve in no time.



4/5 Characterization: I really like how you gave a sense of each of the characters personality in each chapter. There would always be a smile on my face whenever Jaejoong said anything overly sweet. I enjoy the (reader's) personality and her comebacks but I don't like how weak she could be sometimes. It sounds very…indifferent than any other story where the main girl is weak and the guy always protects her. There's nothing really wrong with that but it just bothers me at times.



8/10 Originality: I do think you made your story original enough. Although, there were some moments that are already used by many writers already, I think you choose the right time to include those parts. But overall, you did a good job on making the story original so far with an unoriginal plot.



10/10 Writing Style: I love your choice of words and the way you describe ones' thoughts or dialogues. Your writing style didn't change chapter by chapter and the style stayed the same so far. Next time, I think you should just focus on one characters point of view at one situation instead of jumping off and on to a different characters' thoughts and then to another.



14/15 Overall Enjoyment: "Oppa..." you called after seeing him uncomfortable, he looked up at you.

"Don't worry, I rejected him" you smiled and went inside your house.

…I really just love that part! I really enjoyed your whole story so far. There was always that one moment in every single chapter that made me smile like crazy at my computer screen. You're a great writer and I know that you have much more to offer. Please continue the story! I'm curious over what's going to happen next. My last advice is to put some more originality and check your grammar and spelling. PS: You've earned yourself a new reader. Please update soon, okay? =]



Total: 89.4/100



Thank you for choosing Faithful-dreams!

This was my first review and I'm glad your story was my first.

Please leave a tag and I hope the review satisfied you.

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-SpicyNoodles